10 Things I've learned in my first year of University

In less than 2 weeks, I start my second year at the University of Sussex. And it was a lot harder than you'd think to get there. My first year was full of money troubles; worries about meeting and making friends with my flatmates; balancing my love affair with my bed and my lecture attendance, which I got so horribly wrong; and meeting my friends and my partner. Of course it was stressful, but I learnt so much - lessons I'm now writing out as some of my friends and family members prepare for their first university experience and I hope they take to heart.

1. Freshers' Week is NOT the be all and end all.

My Freshers Week was no fun at all. Yeah, you read that right - I missed my friends, I missed my family, I didn't think I was going to like my flatmates and I'd just got out of a relationship. Basically, I wallowed and wasted money on tickets to events that I didn't go to. Freshers' Week for those with little self-confidence can be painful, and I honestly believed at one point that I would make no friends and had made the biggest mistake of my life because I hadn't enjoyed my Freshers' Week, and wasn't that where you meet all your life-long friends?

Honestly, it's not the end of the world if you're struggling with homesickness or fitting in during Freshers' Week - you're constantly meeting new people throughout the year and if you have great flatmates, like mine turned out to be, you'll spend some time getting to know them in a non-alcohol fuelled setting if that makes you more comfortable. Try everything once but if clubbing's not your thing then there's no shame in calling it an night, so long as you can get home safely and no-one is relying on you to look after them. If you're really struggling many universities have great support networks to help you find your feet, and Nightline offers advice and support solely to students for all kinds of problems you might have. 

I'm now gearing up for my second Freshers' Week, and I'm so excited to be spending it with my friends and my partner.

2. 'The Freshers 15' is real.

SO real. Don't believe me?

 

Don't let the bottle of water fool you. Friday night takeaways, late night snacks and the kebab you got on the way home from Shooshh add up, and before you know it you're 15lbs heavier, moaning about spots that you swear just appeared overnight and complaining that your jeans must have shrunk in the wash. Of course the occasional takeaway or pizza night is not going to matter but seriously, don't waste your entire student loan on food you could quite easily cook at home for half the price.

Equally, don't forget that alcohol contains more calories than you think. A bottle of Sourz can be your best friend when you're having pre-drinks or playing drinking games before going out for the night but did you know there are 103kcal in each shot and over 2000kcal in the bottle? Add that on to the food you've eaten all day and you'll be well over your GDA - it does your waistline no favours. For those really worried about piling on the pounds through alcohol consumption this handy little website shows you the best and the worst beers, ciders and spirits for anyone watching their weight.

3. You can say 'no'.

And this doesn't just apply to sex. University is a hotbed of illicit and illegal activity, and if you know where to look you can find almost anything, but it is your prerogative to do so. Don't feel pressured to try things you don't want to - be it alcohol, sex, drugs, or anything else. On the flip side, respect someone's decision not to partake as there may be a medical reason why they don't want to join in. Alcohol can react badly to medication such as antibiotics, and even drugs like marijuana (which many do consider to be safer than harder drugs and alcohol) can cause serious reactions.

4. There will always be someone cooler than you

When I asked Dan what he'd learnt in his first year of Uni, his response was 'there'll always be someone having more sex than you, and that's okay', and I know that this bothered a few of my friends. University - Freshers' Week in particular - is portrayed as a never-ending party with endless possibilities to score in more than one way, and I'm sure for some people it is, but for the majority it's just an unrealistic expectation and you'll end up spending more time worrying about the lack of sex you're having than actually being in with a chance of having it.

Also, take it from me: it's not that you're not attractive and it's not that nobody likes you; not everyone is interested in a one-night stand and actually, being in a relationship - for me, certainly - is much more satisfying. I'd much rather wait and find someone who I love and love being with than trying to pick up guys in clubs. Also my boyfriend has the best shirts and I don't think I'd be able to steal clothes from a different guy each night.

5. Your BFFL in Sixth Form/College might not ever call you again, and that's okay

Above is a picture of my wall, covered in photos of people I spent my sixth form with - honestly, I heard from about half of them during my first term, and in the second term I gave up trying to keep in contact with those who didn't respond: of course it's sad but sometimes even the closest friends drift apart. If it's meant to be both of you will make the effort to keep in contact but often people change as they mature at University, so don't take it too hard if you find yourself catching up less and less. If you're desperate to make sure you don't lose contact, schedule Skype dates or phone conversations, or - if you can afford it - go and visit!

6. If you live in crap, you'll feel like crap
Cleaning is possibly the most boring thing to do on the planet, but it makes such a difference - sure, living on your own with no-one constantly telling you to tidy your room and to wash your plates is a godsend after 18 years of it, but when you're eating pasta out of a measuring jug because you don't have any clean dinner plates it's kind of time to wash up. Don't forget to hoover as well as dust mites thrive in dirty areas, and can cause issues like asthma to get so much worse.

Also, if you clean regularly your parents won't have a heart attack the one time they visit and you've forgotten to clean (trust me, that argument is one that no-one likes having and can be so easily avoided).

7. Budgeting is boring, but so necessary
I can't stress this one enough - your rent has got to be paid somehow, and your overdraft is NOT free money. I wasted a lot of money that I should have spent on fresh fruit and veggies on accessories, shoes and bags, and sure, they looked pretty on my wall...

...but my bank account did not appreciate it, and nor did my weight when I could only afford cheap pot noodle-type meals. It also sucks to know you can't afford to go out with your friends because you can't afford the bus to town or entry to the club, despite having pretty outfits to wear. If you learn only one thing from your first year, budgeting should be it as you'll need it for the rest of your life.

8. Living on takeaways and noodles is not living.

And it's no preparation for life after university either. There are books galore for students learning to cook for the first time, and there are blogs (including mine!) that feature hearty and healthy meals perfect for students, like this one run by another Sussex University student - his 20p Tomato Sauce recipe is a brilliant budget-friendly way of expanding your culinary skills beyond microwavable meals.

Food is a great way of bringing people together too - we cooked a lamb roast (with veggie sausages for me) last year in the flat which fed 12 of us easily and it was so much fun: a memory that really helped us bond more as a flat and as friends.

  

9. Your mum worries about you.
Odds are, you aren't going to be living at home, and while you're out on the town enjoying yourself your mum will be at home wondering if you're eating right and whether you're washing your bedding often enough, so don't forget to call her - she'll really appreciate it. My mum and I are quite close and we often communicate at least once a day, even if it's just sharing something on Facebook, but I made sure in my first year to call and Skype regularly as I know she worries. Sure, she wasn't happy when I bleached my hair, and she certainly wasn't impressed to find out I'd failed a lab report in the first term, but I know that she was happy to hear from me and know that I was looking after myself. I do really miss having blue hair though.

10. Nothing feels better than getting a good grade/Stress breeds more stress

This one is a little bit tricky - of course, I don't want to encourage you to slack off as all that happens is you end up failing a module, and although the first year counts for nothing you still have to get 40% to pass. No-one likes doing resits during the summer. But at the same time don't push yourself to the limit and spend all your time in the library as you miss out on all the fun!

Unfortunately I got this balance wrong and I really didn't put any effort into my first term, which I discovered a little too late was a mistake, and I had to work so much harder in the second term and over the summer.

These notes were from one of many late-night studying sessions, and the lack of sleep made me anxious and moody and pure misery to be around. I did get a 2:1 in an essay on the ethics of animal testing, which felt awesome, but the amount of work I still had to make up for put a damper on my achievement. It's difficult to balance but it's not worth missing out on work just to play, and vice versa.